Does Exclaiming “I’m Killin’ It” Mean That, in Fact, You’re Not Killin’ It?…Plus, Paul on Narcissism and Kanye West
The other day—in a comment thread at dangerousminds.net—someone suggested that if you declare yourself to be Killin’ It then maybe you’re not really Killin’ It.
What a fantastic point! I’m sure we can all relate to the experience of feeling dismissive—or even disdainful—of such a person. I didn’t get a chance to have a personal exchange with this commenter, but I suspect that his belief comes from something that you might call Kanye Syndrome: that the awareness of your own public image directly diminishes your ability to live outside that image. Like a metaphorical birdcage, the more you say “hey people, look, this is me!” the smaller the cage becomes.
Take for example this latest bit of news regarding Kanye, who just yesterday strung together a stream-of-conscious bombardment of tweets apologizing for hijacking Taylor Swift’s big moment at last year’s Video Music Awards. What a strange move, more than a year after the fact. I think it’s safe to say that Kanye may indeed have taken his own sense of Killin’ It too far. Let’s face it, he’s is a major talent and yes, he’s Killin’ It, but perhaps he’s let that confidence take him over the top. It has cost him. He’s lost fans and dropped away from the limelight in the past year. He ceased Killin’ It when he behaved too much like a man who knew he was Killin’ It. He Killed It too hard.
That is indeed a danger, as are hubris and arrogance and ignorance, all of which may come by saying, I’m Killin’ It! But I believe there is a bigger danger: fear. The fear that what you think of yourself and how you live may not actually be able to withstand exposure. That to reveal yourself would be to reveal your flaws and weakness and that revelation would cost you your power. As long as you are silent you are safe. And safety is a cage of its own. Muhammed Ali, Snoop Dogg, Arnold Schwarzenegger, or Lady Gaga would never have approved of such conduct. They are people who talk the talk and walk the walk.
The greatest asset of humanity is communication. The ability to transfer fundamental ideas between each other does not happen in silence or safety, and only through bold declarative living do we allow ourselves to be witnessed in a way which just might help or inspire another human.
Perhaps that is why I cringed and laughed aloud when I read the following tweet from Kanye re: the VMA incident. “I’m sorry, Taylor,” he wrote, “we’re both artists, and the media and managers are trying to get between us. She deserves the apology more than anyone. Thank you [Twitter co-founders] Biz Stone and Evan Williams for creating a platform where we can communicate directly.”
Communicate directly? Hardly! Unfortunately for Kanye, such statements will not help him resume a normative Killin’ It status.
Finally, for me, part of Killin’ It is understanding what the human spirit is up against. Institutions. Corporations. Academies. Organizations with far more power than the individual are constantly—and incessantly—after your mantra, your power. Lonely defiance is not enough. We need a shared experience of defiance to empower us. Killin’ It is that experience. Killin’ It feeds not only on Killin’ It energy. So yes, say it out loud and share it out loud. Killin’ It requires that. But it also requires walking the walk after talking the talk. That’s somethig we all have to continually strive for.
I’m Paul Crik. Let’s go Kill It.
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